The Trouble with Zippers

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Did you know that zippers were invented almost 100 years ago and became popular as a fastener for children's clothing in the 20's and 30's. I would have to believe that those who made the first zippers and decided that they should be the fastener of choice for children's clothes were not Kindergarten teachers (especially those in cold weather climates).
Each day I stand guard at my classroom door making sure none of my young students venture outside without their jackets zipped up. This means helping some of them get the zipper started, unsticking the cloth that has gotten caught in the zipper and doing the zipper up those last few inches so those slender young necks are covered. And it never fails that as I pull up the zipper they put their chins down and Oww, the chin gets zipped! Finally everyone is out the door and I get a few minutes break until they come back in and we start the task of unzipping the jackets. This shouldn't be as hard, right??? Well, not unless you have a jacket with a broken zipper. Let me describe an incident that happened today. One of my students came in and his jacket was attached at the neck but the rest of the zipper was split wide open. He pulled and twisted and finally decided he was not going to budge the zipper. That's when he called for help from the "Zipper Expert". I tried to pull it down, then up, but neither worked. I tried to zip it up from the bottom but that failed too. By now he is getting quite flushed and the sweat is running down his face and so I decided I better get the jacket off the poor little guy. The arms came out easily and then it was a quick pull over the head. Oops!! The jacket is not going over the head. Ears are bend back and he is stuck tighter than Winnie the Pooh when he went to visit Rabbit and ate too much honey. After he cried " My eyes hurt!" I gave up with going over the head and began the task of pulling it back down again. That was easier said than done. I think his nose is a little bit flatter now. Then it was back to pulling and pushing and stretching and I was just about to find the scissors when I felt the zipper begin to move. Slowly I was able to get the zipper down far enough to get him out and then with a good tug the Zipper Expert had done it again.
Of course it's not just little people's zippers that I fix. I've unstuck zippers on adults and children alike. But I think life would be so much simpler if all jackets had buttons. At least them I wouldn't have to worry about rearranging someone's ears, bruising chins and flattening noses. And I'd get at least 5 more minutes of recess each day!!!!